Thanksgiving & the Christmas Season

There is so much I am thankful for this holiday season. I am thankful for my mom, she has been there for me all the time. eventhough I hesitate to tell her some things I still love her and appreciate everything she has done for me throughout the 22 years she has taken care of my needs and other things along the way. I am so thankful that her health has been as good as it has been until these recent years with the cervical cancer, and the breast lumps (which have only been cysts), and the cysts that were growing on her ovries. she has been through so much, and she has remained as positive as she can through it all. she has had to endure a lot, especially with her cervical cancer. she is such a fighter, and she has done the best she can to remain strong through it all.

I know that in my heart if anything ever happened to my mom, I would have a very difficult time with it. I do love my mom and I want her to be around for as long as I can. I want her to see me have my own kids one day, wither that means adopting, or getting a surrogate mother to hold my egg(s) for 9 months so I can have my own child. I want to be able to have her see me get married and start my own little family. I want her to be able to see my kids grow up

I am also thankful for my Aunt Joanne. today as it is thanksgiving, I think of the 35 years that she has suffered with Diabetes. and as she sat home today throwing up, and having diarrhea, and her time of the month today I wish that she felt better. although I know her body is probably tired of everything, especially after living with diabetes for so long. lately I have thought about what it would be like if she was not here. (I know that I shouldn't be thinking about these things yet) but I know it isgoing to be very difficult for me when she is not here anymore, since we are so close. Joanne and I are as close as Bobby and I were, and so losing another close relative will be very hard for me.

I know that Joanne has many more years to come to enjoy this life, and live it the best that she can through her health problems she is experiencing, has experienced, or that she may experience later on down the road.

with that being said, I am thankful for my health, and the fact that I am not a diabetic, or that I have not caught the disease. I want to keep it that way, so that all I have to deal with is my seizures. I am so thankful that I have not had any terrible seizures recently, that would have hospitalized me or anything. I am also thankful that eventhough my shunt is not working that it has not cause me any other issues too great, other than maybe an ocassional headache.

I am so thankful that I have had my mom's mom around as my grandma for so long. it is so difficult for me to see my only living grandma declining, she seems stable right now but she is not getting any better. by that I mean she is not gaining too much weight, and her mind is not as sharp as it once use to be. I remember that my grandma would send me stickers in the mail all the time, and that started happening less and less all the time, then it finally stopped altogether. I loved getting those stickers in the mail from Grandma, I always looked forward to that. to this very day I still have all of the dtickers she has sent me in the mail. most of them are in a sticker book that I have had for many, many years. I do love my grandma, eventhough she is the way she is. she is so innocent and much like a little child. I do love my grandma so much! I love to play I Stand All Amazed for her, as that is her favorite hymn. everytime she is down here she always wants m to play it for her, so I do. I play it for her as many times as she wants me to. she even sings along while I play the song.

there is so much more that I am thankful for, but this post would be way long. for all of those I have not mentioned or named, you know who you are. I am so thankful for you being in my life as well. and most of all I am so thankful for the beautiful talent of learning the piano that I have gained in this life. I am so thankful for Erin, as well as my other piano teachers along the way who have helped make this possible.

Happy Thanksgiving!!